First of all, let me say that I am not someone who is very focused on my overall diet, health or fitness. So, when people around my office started talking about cleanses and juice diets I wasn't very interested at first. But after the conversations continued for several weeks I started to wonder what exactly would happen if I laid off of sugar, carbs, booze, caffeine, meat and well, anything except for juice for a few days.
It turns out that my cubicle mate, Michele, had done a few juice cleanses in the past so we -- for whatever reason -- decided to put our bodies and our will to the test and cleanse it up. We signed up for a three-day "serious cleansing" from Elixir Juice in New York City, but there are a billion different varieties of cleanses out there. For a not inexpensive fee we received six different juices per day, each with their own cute name (like "mood mender") and ingredients to coordinate with whatever my body may need at the time of day I was drinking each blend.
Day one was pretty good. The whole novelty of doing a juice cleanse was exciting. I started my morning off with an "all greens" mix that tasted like a liquid salad made of mostly kale. Later in the morning I had my second juice of some fruity mixture that was basically all grapefruit. When lunchtime rolled around it was time for a blend called "skin tonic" that I swear was made with actual skin. The bottle said it was made with things like apple, celery and spinach, but I definitely think there was some skin in there. The juices were actually pretty good and I was feeling fine until 2:30pm when -- in the middle of a meeting -- I thought I was going insane. I got a throbbing headache (probably because of caffeine withdrawal) and felt super agitated and squirrely. Post-meeting I ran back to my desk for my next juice called "fatique fighter" which was mostly watermelon. It was good, but only returned me partially back to my normal self. After regaining sanity I ended my work day with a putrid concoction of beet and hatred (seriously, the worst one!) and then had one final juice before bed that actually tasted like a liquified oatmeal cookie. How convenient of the juice lords to end the day with a pleasant-tasting drink to make me forget the skin and beet torture of earlier in the day. I went to bed feeling a little bit lighter and proud of myself.
