Let me start by saying that I really enjoy Facebook. Well I guess that I used to. Facebook has jumped the shark and I am not quite sure how it happened.
Let's all think back to when Facebook just came out. Can we even REMEMBER life before it? I think I was a freshman or sophomore in college. We are talking 2002 here. It was only open to SOME colleges and you just desperately waited for your college to be added to the list. There was no such thing as a Top 5 or a Bumper Sticker. Facebook used to just be a really cool way to connect to friends you hadn't seen in a very long time, or even those that you just saw in class.
And now we have come to this.
I know that I'm not writing for STFUParents but I went to highschool with this girl. And because of what Facebook has become, I know entirely too much about Valerie. Clearly... way... too... much.
Facebook grew and grew and now you do not even have to be a student at a college, or even highschool... you can be anyone. What used to be a social networking site for people of a certain age and generation has evolved into something completely different. I have two aunts over 40 who have Facebook. My boss who is 45 and the biggest doofus I know has Facebook. I rest my case. I am all for technology educating and reaching out to those who may have been left behind in the internet boom, but not in my Facebook please.
Recently websites have emerged that are a direct commentary on the madness that Facebook has become. STFUMarried and STFUParents are sites where people anonymously (or not if they really want to be evil) email in posts from offenders of being GROSSLY in love or all about their kids. It is actually a really interesting phenomenon when you think about it. The convergence of Generation X and Y's technological abilities with the age of marriage and becoming parents. What was once a profile picture of a drunken night at a club has been replaced by a picture of you walking down the aisle. You once posed in a bikini and now you are showing your pregnant belly. It is weird for me to see (and thanks to the NEW Facebook... I have no choice) every aspect of your life and how it changes.
So I think we need to come up with some new rules for Facebook (and PLEASE add to these because I am sure there are so many more you can think of):
- Your child's picture cannot and should not be your profile picture. It is weird and just wrong.
- While we are at it... if you have kids... why are you on Facebook?
- A sonogram is not a profile picture. Okay, I get it. You are pregnant and I am very happy for you. But don't you want to keep that private picture to yourself. And I KNOW you had to scan that picture. They don't email it to you. WHO owns a scanner? And while we are at it... NO PREGNANT BELLY SHOTS!
- You love him. And he loves you. You don't need to clog up your wall with it. We see you are in a relationship (or married... or it's complicated) I don't need to see your foreplay in the form of status messages.
- Never ever ever write the word uterus. Ever! You hear that Valerie?!
- I do not need to tell you that I am a fan of everything. As stated on my blog I was asked to become a fan of NOT Being on Fire. Jumped the shark.
I am sure there are many more and PLEASE put them in the comments section. And Valerie, if you by chance are reading this... Keep up the updates. Like a train wreck- I can't look away.
You can listen to Eric sound off on other annoying issues on his blog No Nut Food, and if you'd like to write about something just email me and you might be the next Summer Friday blogger!
Related Things:
- Read all the Summer Friday entries