July 23, 2010

Summer Friday: Turning 30? The Writing's On the (Facebook) Wall

Every Friday between Memorial Day and Labor Day I'm going to be featuring guest bloggers as a part of my "Summer Fridays" series. This week's post comes very a brave Sean M. who muses on the lessons he learned while going from his 20s to his 30s last week.

I turned 30 last week. Lots of people gave me their two cents, which is funny because I didn't really ask anyone for advice. But boy, did it come pouring in. I received phone calls, birthday cards, text message, tweets... but by far the most popular form of birthday advice giving came by way of my very public Facebook page. Let's take a peek at some of my favorites and the lessons I learned from them.

And it was. I went to Arriba Arriba, my favorite restaurant in the whole world, for dinner and drinks. I go to Arriba at least once a week and have been since I was in my early 20s. This isn't about to change any time soon. Turning 30 helped me to understand that this wasn't like a death. This wasn't an instantaneous change; the loss of a job or a loved one. It's a slow change that really does start way before you hit the big 3-0.

Last Friday, I stayed in with a glass of Pinot Grigio (OK - several glasses, who am I kidding). Two years ago, I don't think this would have happened. I was constantly going out, constantly needing to be surrounded by friends. I was afraid I'd be missing out. Now, that seems crazy to me. I have slowly calmed down over the past few years. What am I really missing? The same guys at the same bar drinking the same drinks talking about the same old crap. Sure, I still like to go out (and I do go out,) but all the time? Crazy. And honestly, now going out on a Thursday means I'm missing Bethenny Getting Married?. No thanks.

While we're talking about going out, as I've gotten older, I've also slowly realized I don't give a shit about hot boys who only talk to other hot boys anymore. Honestly, you're hot now but when you're too old to tend bar what will you be doing with your life? (This only goes for hot guys who are jerks. If you're a nice guy, I'm sure good things will happen to you in the future. And I appreciate you acknowledging me even though I am not a supermodel.) See! Slow change.

First off, extra nose hairs is no joke. They actually started coming in during my late 20s, so beware for early bloomers. Anyway, I had been prepping myself for the big birthday since I turned 29. Sometimes I actually got excited about it. About a week before the big day, I was no longer ready for it. I wasn't excited. I was mourning my 20s. Then I popped one of my roommate's Xanax and I was OK again. It's just a birthday. Snap out of it.

My moms best friend gave me a card that wished me a "Happy 'Special' Birthday". I appreciated that. I was sick of all the cards with huge 30s printed all over the front. Even though I, too, am guilty of purchasing annoying cards for my friends turning 30. It seemed thoughtful at the time. It shows that I actually looked for a card that made sense and didn't just pick up a generic one. Now I know better. Yes, it's just a birthday, but when you keep getting 30 30 30 30 shoved in your face, it becomes more than that. You make yourself a little crazy for no reason.

Turning 30 means having 30 years of memories -- good and bad -- hopefully good. I have amazing friends, a wonderful family and a plethora of memories from the past three decades. And Julie Chen really does create some fabulous memories.

When we were in Fire Island last weekend, my friend Billy and I saw this enormous wave in the distance heading towards the shore. We stood at the edge of the water and waited for it to crash down on us. It looked like it was getting bigger and bigger... and we waited... and it just never came to fruition. This is kind of like how the actual day of turning 30 felt. I had been building it up in my head for the past week, waiting for this crazy feeling of being 30 to wash over me. When it finally happened... it was quiet... soft. It just sort of tip toed up and... it was nice.

I feel like I have reached a point in my life where I am happy and I can tell you I certainly wasn't at this point a year ago. So being 30 years and 11 days old does feel quite different from being 29 years and 11 days... just in a surprisingly good way.

Loved this post! I'm only a few years away from the big 3-0 so it's nice to know what I can expect. Click here to read all of the Summer Friday entries.